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To combat the violence is responsibility of every one
The violence in the streets of Brazilian cities is very frightened. The fights between people in the traffic and in bars scare everybody, but this violence is inside of the school too and it damages a good formation of all our children.
According to student’s parents and headmistress of several schools the pedagogic actions can be a powerful instrument that the population can use against the violence.
It was suggested by Universidade de Brasília that did a study about this subject. According this study in the school where everybody do something to combat the violence together other people, the violence is smaller than other school that the people don’t took this attitude and did nothing together with other people to combat the violence.
In some of Brazilian states the violence decreased until 35% because the community and the school to take a rigth attitud to change this terrible situation and they dicovered they can to associate against this social problem and this way to win it.
In Paraná, for example, the violence was reduced 34%, because to reduce the violence in the school and in the community every person did something and compromised itself with a little effort to solve this problem or at last reduce it in our socity.
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Hi Vanilde,
This essay is well-organized and presents good arguments. However, you nedd to review the sentence structures and the vocabulary choices. Please, rewrite the text and show it to me again,
Comment byBest wishes,
You teacher
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